[00:00:00] Welcome back to another episode on the podcast. I’m your host, Christina, and this is Rebuilding You Empowered Healing for divorced women. And today I’m gonna go over all of the ways to cult, cultivating and establishing your home after divorce and really helping you lean into claiming this new space as your.

[00:00:25] Own. And that was really a big thing for me when I went through my divorce was I had moved into a new home and. It didn’t feel like home, and so I wanted to share all of the ways that really helped me to begin to cultivate a new relationship with my new home, help it become a safe space for me, and a place that I truly can call home.

[00:00:56] And so before we jump into it, I just wanted to remind you, be sure to sign up for the newsletter if you’re not already signed up yet. It is free divorce support where I dive a lot deeper on so many different topics. And it’s done weekly, straight to your inbox and it’s absolutely free. So go to the link in the show notes and you can sign up.

[00:01:20] I have one link that just connects to. All of the different things, the newsletter, the ways to work with me, my offerings, things like that. So, it’s Link Tree, so it’s l i n k t.ee/her heart heels. And you can sign up for the newsletter there. I also wanted to remind you if you get some aha moments on this episode or you’ve implemented something from a past episode into your life, definitely tag me.

[00:01:54] Shout me out at her heart heels on Instagram. I love celebrating your wins with you. So if I could be part of your divorce support team, I am all for it. And without further ado, let’s just jump right in. So, As I mentioned, some of the things that I had to do when I was cultivating a safe space for my new home and really creating an environment that felt like me, an environment that I loved, that felt welcoming to me when I walked through the door and I’m like, ah, it feels like home.

[00:02:32] Like I have to admit, when I first moved into my home, After my divorce, it felt a little bit eerie. It felt weird. and there’s little things that we can do that can really help a space feel like home. And I don’t think it was until like, I would say, a good year of being in my home that it felt like me.

[00:02:56] And so, Obviously, this sounds a lot easier said than done. It’s personalizing our space so we can really infuse our personality into our home. You can always start by selecting colors and patterns and textures that resonate with you that. Help you cultivate a safe space. One of the fun ways to do this is by going on Pinterest and just looking at all of the different spaces and starting to pay attention to color themes.

[00:03:31] And then when you have that, you can incorporate. These colors, these textures, these patterns into your home. And you don’t even have to go and actually search if you’re already on Pinterest, you can probably just scroll the feed that you have and it’ll already kind of give you that feedback of what you need to do to personalize your space, what you naturally gravitate towards, and then also include in personalizing your space.

[00:04:01] I would encourage like a really inexpensive way to do it. Like it doesn’t have to be redecorating or going out and spending money, but displaying meaningful photographs, artwork, and sentimental items can also add a personal touch. Another thing that you can do is rearranging and redecorating, so just getting creative, and this is really more for.

[00:04:26] If you’re, if you’ve been in a home since your divorce and it just feels kind of blah, it’s also my favorite way to spruce things up. Or if you stayed in your existing home after your divorce, this is so clutch like moving your furniture and rearranging the layout of a room can absolutely create a fresh and transformative energy.

[00:04:51] It just totally changes up the whole vibe. I did another episode with Lina Capta. It was definitely one of the first episodes that I did, so you’ll have to scroll down the feed, but she’s a Feng Shui expert, and she definitely shared ways that you can rearrange it, rearrange your home according to energy, which I find.

[00:05:15] Super interesting, and I definitely took a lot of her advice when it came to rearranging my home, and it made all of the difference. So if you wanted to adopt some Feng shui styles, definitely go back to that podcast episode and check it out. But. If you try different arrangements, see what feels most comfortable for you, and what feels empowering for you, something that you can do.

[00:05:40] It’s like if you play around with your furniture, just have fun with it, and then like, Live in it for a couple of days and see how you feel. You don’t have to decide on it right then and there. You can always rearrange that furniture later. You can do things later, but really just trying to get outta your element and trying something new can be so empowering.

[00:06:04] And with this, it’s also, you know, if you have the budget for it, bringing in some inexpensive decor items, throw pillows, curtains, rugs, it can really help to freshen up the space. Also, different like air fresheners, things like that. Different scents can really open up the space and the goal there. And the goal with doing that is to establish a sanctuary.

[00:06:29] So just remember that. If you treat your home like a sanctuary, everything that you do in your home becomes sacred because you are establishing that this. Place is a place that is going to help you feel welcome. It’s gonna help you feel loved. You’re encouraging the creation of a peaceful and calming space within your home.

[00:06:53] And so you can establish a sanctuary by incorporating little cozy nooks. Something that I did in my home was a meditation corner and also turning my bathroom into a spa-like retreat, and so I ended up using things that I already had in my bathroom and rearranged some things. I ended up getting like one new picture at Home Goods that was maybe like $10 and just to add something new to freshen it up, but I just.

[00:07:25] Changed some things around and really made my bathroom like a total zen. Zen spot. And so when we treat our home like a sanctuary, we’re again establishing that connection with our home, and we’re giving it the power to really nurture us and give back. And so adding elements like soft lighting, scented candles, comfortable seating and soothing music can contribute to a sense of serenity.

[00:07:56] Another item that can really help us establish our home is probably my favorite, probably the hardest thing to do, but it’s decluttering and organizing. When you can declutter and organize your space, it can be a huge physical manifestation of emotional baggage release. I’m sure you know this feeling when I’m talking about like when you declutter and when you take so many things out of your space.

[00:08:37] Oh man, it totally changes the vibe. So I wanna encourage you to let go of items that no longer serve you and also create a more organized environment. And this also includes belongings that either you purchase during your marriage or gifts from your ex. Girl, it’s time to purge. It is time to move on from that because it does carry an energy and this process can be extremely cathartic and symbolize a fresh start.

[00:09:15] I sold or gave away everything. From my marriage or that my ex-husband and I purchased together, so that I don’t hang onto anything energetically and I don’t have that energy in my home. And selling these items is also a really great way to get some extra cash to buy fresh new things. So if you know you’re on a budget selling some of the items that you have that you’ve been hanging onto, Just allows for that new exchange of good and new energy, new vibes.

[00:09:53] When we go and we look for new furniture and new things that express who we are now as individuals, as divorced women, and we’re moving on into our own independent lives and finding the beauty in that, we’re welcoming new things that describe our personality, and you don’t need to rush into purchasing anything new.

[00:10:15] Because it’s also part of the journey of self exploration when we’re figuring out who we are, what our new values are. you know, who we are as individuals to then to start establish our own sense of style. So also don’t feel pressured to go out and get anything right away. Like, take your time. you know, if it’s something simple like a candle or.

[00:10:38] Things that don’t necessarily like stand the test of time, that they just kind of, you can use those in the meantime. But then when it comes to like big furniture pieces, you’re able to really purchase something that describes your personality and yours alone. Ugh. The best. And the last thing I wanted to cover here when it comes to creating, your home and establishing your home and just a great vibe is creating rituals in your home.

[00:11:11] I talked a little bit about a establishing a relationship with your home. And I get it like your home isn’t a being, but our home is our container for our energy, and it’s also a container for the energy of the people that visit our home and. Come in and out of our home and experience our home. And I’m sure you can relate, like when you have gone into other places and you’re like, I don’t know, there’s something special about this place.

[00:11:41] That’s the kind of energy that I’m talking about. And so in establishing a relationship, You are allowing this space to give back to you. And so a way to do that is to create rituals. if you can establish rituals that foster self-care and emotional healing, you can begin to be vulnerable. In this space and allow this space to give back to you and nurture you and make you feel safe.

[00:12:11] And the more that you’re able to have this connection with your home, the more it’ll start to truly feel like home and be something that you really value. And so this could involve setting up a dedicated space for journaling, practicing mindfulness, and engaging in creative activities as well. I, one of the things that I really loved to do in my home was to do watercoloring, and it was just such a fun, creative outlet and allowed me to kind of process my emotions and my feelings and get creative and play around with some unique elements in my home.

[00:12:50] And so make sure that you’re incorporating meaningful rituals into your daily routines as well. And that reinforces a sense of empowerment, a sense of growth within yourself when you’re starting to do your daily routines. this also transformed how I do household chores. I turned them into rituals, and so now when I do chores, I.

[00:13:15] Like, I know like when I vacuum, I like to put on really uplifting music and music that I can dance to and sync to so that it’s fun. That is a ritual. So sometimes people can think ritual is super woowoo, but it’s a ritual is actually just a set of things that. Help you do an activity to help you cultivate a relationship with yourself and a relationship with your higher self relationship with God, a relationship with the universe to truly kind of bear your soul and allow yourself to be safe and seen and held and nurtured.

[00:13:53] And. it makes household chores that much more exciting, I’ll tell you that. But I hope that this was helpful for you and I would love to see and encourage you to do one of these items, whether that’s even organizing like your makeup drawer, maybe throwing out some old makeup because again, like makeup only lasts.

[00:14:17] I forgot, like I think there’s different shelf lives for things like foundations and powders and things like that, but go declutter your makeup drawer. Go clean your makeup brushes. That could be just a simple activity of decluttering, but go and do one of these items and let me know. Send me a DM on Instagram.

[00:14:38] I would love to see it. And I’m actually. Soon as we hop off this recording, I’m gonna go and do some cleaning myself. I’m gonna go put on some fun music and vacuum, oh, the joys of Adulting. But I hope that this helped you and again, I’d love to know your feedback. If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to reach out.

[00:15:01] You know where to find me. Again, I’m your host, Christina. Thanks so much for joining, and until next time, bye.